So the Writing 101 challenge for today is free writing. 20 mins no editing just go with the flow.
I think this challenge will really help me to just write more creatively than logically and analytically. You see my problem seems to be that when I sit down to write I can have a real sense of what to write and a passion about the topic that is on my mind but when I actually start typing my analytical brain kicks in and I start organizing and thinking about the flow.
This tends to stifle what I was intending to write. I mean it made sense in my head when I was rough composing the post but once I start to put it on the page it sounds dry and passionless and I inevitably go on tangents that not only take away from the thrust of the post but do not satisfy my recollection of the thoughts I had pre-text.
Take an unfinished post I began the other day. (See I almost went on an explanatory tangent there. Piss me off!!). It was about sin and it’s origins. Well my passionate brain was going through the arguments pretty good but as soon as I sat down to transfer thought to page I got into all kinds of twists and turns that slowed down the pace and detracted from the point I was trying to make.
I don’t know if it’s some kind of driving force within that compels me to write that way. It’s like I’m trying to convince the person who’s going to read it of the correctness of my opinion before I’ve given my opinion. Does that make any sense?
What I was thinking was that Christians today, and for a good chunk of history, have taught certain things but didn’t really believe them. They said the words but put conditions on them in order to avoid the inevitable and obvious conclusion which turns out to be so unacceptable to their theology they just accept contradiction in order to maintain their spiritual equilibrium.
This is most likely the result of our having been taught certain key doctrines by those whom we believed knew better right out of the gait when our spiritual minds soaked up all the teachings we could get about God and the things of God.
They were communicated in such a was as to imply that we would lose our salvation if we questioned them in any way whatsoever. Probably shouldn’t use ‘whatsoever’ but I like it so too bad. So we never did. Question the doctrines. Just in case you got lost there.
But in the back of our minds we had nagging doubts about them. For example. The Bible says that God created everything. No qualifier. Everything. You ask a Christian if they believe that and they will say ‘yes’. Ask them if that includes sin and evil and they will emphatically say ‘no’.
What they meant by ‘yes’ is that God created everything that was good. They agreed with the verse that said God created everything but what they actually did was added the words ‘that was good’. This is because they cannot accept that a holy God could create evil and sin.
Why? Because they think that makes God sinful. But they don’t understand that sin means missing the mark. Coming up short. So that the only way God would ‘sin’ is if sin wasn’t created by him. In other words if God did not intend for sin to be in the world then that means that God failed, or sinned.
The irony here is that by saying God did not create sin they actually make God out to be a sinner.
Now why couldn’t I just do that when I attempted to write a post about this 2 days ago? Because I analyzed the crap out of it and went on about sin and how bad it was and blah, blah, blah.
I am retiring in a little over a year and am nervous and excited about it. I mean you don’t wok at a place for 30 years and not feel a bit anxious about the day you wake up and don’t have to go there any more. On the other hand it will be a great feeling to know that I am getting paid not to work there any more.
This makes time flow in funny ways. It seems that it will take a long time to arrive but it’s already September. When I started counting down the number of days left to the big day it was over 600 and now it’s down to 380 or about 250 or so working days.
So while time appears to be moving slow on a day to day level it is flying by on an overall level.
Sort of like growing old. 40’s were a blur and my 50’s feel like I’ve entered some sort of time tunnel that accelerates constantly. This creates unique problems for me concerning chronology. I remember things but have no concept of how long ago they happened. The only anchors I have are my family’s birthdays, (and by family I mean immediate family. VERY immediate), the moon landing, (if it really happened), the ’72 series, the fall of the Berlin wall, Y2K and 9/11. Other than that I might as well throw a dart at at a wall with years on it.
Well I’m guessing that’s been about 20 mins and so I think I can say challenge met.
(I have this overwhelming desire to go back and edit this. By overwhelming I mean the same urgency you would feel after eating a pound of prunes to take an Olympic sized shit.)